Browsing Tag

mom blog about life with 2 kids

Daily Life

A much needed 3 day weekend

What are everyone’s plans for the 3 day weekend?! I’m so ready, you guys. This has been a really rough with the kids for me. Isabelle is at the age where she wants things but doesn’t know enough words so she’s constantly screaming and clawing at me because she’s upset I don’t know what she wants.

“Can you please get out of the car? It’s time to get out of the car. Let’s get out of the car now. Get out of the car, NOW. Okay I’m going to count to 3 and then I’m going to remove your body from the car.” 

K has really struggled with listening this week too. Everything I ask her starts out like “Can you please get out of the car? It’s time to get out of the car. Let’s get out of the car now. Get out of the car, NOW. Okay I’m going to count to 3 and then I’m going to remove your body from the car.” *Tantrum of the century ensues*… And rinse and repeat for every thing I ask all day. I’m exhausted. I’m spent. Having one of those weeks I wish I could run away! I’m so ready for a 3 day weekend and for Jason to be able to help with the girls. What is everyone else doing this weekend? Any fun plans?

Daily Life

Who does a chore/behavior chart?

Let’s talk chore/behavior/sticker charts. Who does them and how do you do yours? Katie is almost 3.5 so we want something that makes sense to her. What rewards does everyone use? Toys? Money? I think that K knows she’s supposed to like money, although I don’t think she completely understands its value.

What rewards does everyone use? Toys? Money?

And how often for rewards? It would be weird to tell K she doesn’t get her reward Friday for something she did on Monday, but I also don’t want to be giving her a reward every day. And then what behaviors or chores do you use? We want enough that it will improve her behavior like listening, going to bed when it’s bed time, picking up toys, etc., but just saying “listening” is so vague. Does it mean listening to everything every single time? Because that seems like a recipe for failure.

Just saying “listening” is so vague. Does it mean listening to everything every single time?

I need suggestions! Interested to hear how everyone else is doing this, what worked and didn’t work, and if you noticed an improvement in behavior because of it.

Daily Life

My Stage 5 Clinger

My sweet baby girl! It’s a beautiful burden having such an attached baby. We laugh because we had to put up the baby gate the minute Katie started crawling and we left it up until she was 18 months old. We have never put the baby gate up for Isabelle because she is never not touching me. Some days it drives me crazy. When I’m using the bathroom, when I’m trying to put on my shoes, when I’m trying to do literally anything that requires body autonomy…

When I’m using the bathroom, when I’m trying to put on my shoes, when I’m trying to do literally anything that requires body autonomy…

And it doesn’t make for an enjoyable start to the day when you’re trying to pack your kids’ lunches so you can go somewhere fun and there’s a baby screaming at your feet and tugging on your pants because you had to set them down for 5 minutes. There are times Jason holds her so I can have a break and she stares at me and cries the whole time. Does not feel like a break.

It’s sweet, it’s exhausting. Some days I want to melt, some days I want to pull my hair out.

But she’s also the snuggliest baby I’ve ever met. On the rare occasions she does walk away to play on her own, she comes back every couple minutes to climb up on my lap, lie her head on my chest, and suck her thumb for a minute before getting back down to play. (And rinse and repeat every 3 minutes until she’s done playing…) She is constantly bringing me books and curling up next to me so I can read to her and she holds on so tight when I carry her. It’s sweet, it’s exhausting. Some days I want to melt, some days I want to pull my hair out. I know it won’t last forever, but it’s definitely a different experience than when K was a baby. It’s funny how different siblings can be.

Daily Life

ParentDaze is 1 year old!

ParentDaze is 1 year old! This was the first photo I posted on IG and facebook, and it was also my first outing with both girls. I was 3 weeks post c-section and couldn’t lift K yet so all we could was walk and I had to keep both girls in the stroller the whole time. K still brought her pacifier EVERYWHERE and I lived in flip flops.

I was 3 weeks post c-section and couldn’t lift K yet so all we could was walk

I can’t believe how much I have grown since then. I remember being so scared about being a mom of 2 and now it’s like I have been doing it my whole life. I feel empowered! I have grown a lot as a writer as well. I started my ParentDaze blog as an outlet for my feelings, almost like a journal. I think I have really found my voice (and way less emojis ?. Why was I using so many in the beginning? ???)

I started my ParentDaze blog as an outlet for my feelings.

I am also branching out and writing more about myself and MY life, separate from the kids. When I started ParentDaze, it felt like my life WAS the kids. And it kind of was at the time. A 2 year old and a new baby are pretty consuming. But now I am gaining a little more independence back. I will still be sharing a lot about parenting, asking for advice, and speaking about our struggles, but I plan to branch out and do more lifestyle pieces too.

I am not my kids, and while being a mom is the most important job I’ve ever had, it does not define who I am.

I am also changing my profile photo on instagram today, to one of myself. Because I am not my kids, and while being a mom is the most important job I’ve ever had, it does not define who I am. I am really excited about the future of ParentDaze, and so grateful to everyone who has been supporting me all this time. My mom, my real life friends, and new IG and facebook friends within whom I have found an amazing support network. 

Daily Life

1 Year Ago today…. 39 weeks pregnant with Isabelle

What a difference a year can make! Here I am 39 weeks pregnant with Isabelle! 1 year ago right around this time, I was having my c section. I remember driving there and being so full of worry. Partly about the surgery and recovery, but also about what a new baby would mean to our family. How could I love another baby as much as I love Katie? How would Katie feel about our new family member? Would my relationship with Katie change? Was I selfish for bringing another baby into our family and forcing Katie to split the attention? How on earth would I manage 2 kids?!

How could I love another baby as much as I love Katie? How would Katie feel about our new family member? Would my relationship with Katie change? 

It’s so funny looking back now. Even in the beginning, it felt partly like Isabelle was brand new, but also like she had always been a part of our family. Yes, the girls fight over toys sometimes and there are days where it seems like someone is always crying, but watching them roll around together laughing reminds me that having them was the best thing that has ever happened to me. The days can be long and hectic, but my heart is always full. And just as these worries from last year are gone, I try to remember my present worries are not so big that they won’t be gone this time next year too.

Daily Life

Gender Roles in the Home

Do you have traditional gender roles in your house? We are kind of mixed over here. I am the one who builds things and puts air in the tires, and I also cook and do the dishes. Jason cleans more often than I do (because he is way more efficient than I am), he works outside the home, and he handles all the computer/electronics problems (“Babe!! The internet is broke again!”) I shop for groceries and Jason usually shops for toiletries. Monday-Wed Jason wakes up with the girls and does breakfast and gets them dressed while I relax or work out, and then Thurs-Sun I get up with them so he can sleep in.

We don’t call anything “girl jobs” or “boy jobs” in our house

We don’t call anything “girl jobs” or “boy jobs” in our house, and I think the girls are really absorbing that from us. It makes me happy to see Katie play with tools AND help me cook AND play with dinosaurs AND pretend to feed her doll. I want my girls to know they can become doctors or firefighters or chefs or teachers. That they can be moms or not be moms. That they can do math and yoga and learn to weld and also to sew. That they are smart and courageous and worth more than their looks, but that it’s also okay if they love makeup and fashion. I want to raise strong women, and every day I try to show them that they can be anything they want to be.

Daily Life

I’m back to work!

This is my “excited to be back to work” face! Now that Isabelle is getting older and (slightly) less demanding, I decided it was time! I feel like when I’m working, even part-time, I’m my best self. Something about having deadlines actually helps me be more productive. I think maybe knowing I have less time makes me less likely to procrastinate? Not to mention my boss is pretty awesome and nothing beats working from home!  Feeling like a #girlboss today!

Daily Life

My Baby Girl is 3!!

My baby girl is 3! It seems like forever ago, and yet only yesterday, that we brought you home from the hospital. And we were TERRIFIED. What do we do with this tiny human?! We worried about everything! (Or I did, rather.) Is she getting enough milk? She’s been sleeping for too long, is she breathing? Is her poop supposed to look like this? (I can’t even count the amount of photos of baby poop I looked at…)

What do we do with this tiny human?!

I remember the colic days, and the guilt I had because I didn’t know how to help you. And then between 3 and 4 months the colic got better, and you started to develop more of a personality. Between 6 and 7 months you got your first 2 teeth, learned to crawl, sit up, and pull to stand all within a few weeks. And you let us know that your brain was BUSY! Those were rough nights for sleep!

You got your first 2 teeth, learned to crawl, sit up, and pull to stand all within a few weeks.

Your development sped up after that. Feeding yourself, walking, and then saying a few words like Mama, Dada, and Up. (And waffle shortly after that. Waffles are important, I get it.) By 18 months you were hiking short hikes with me and climbing out of your crib with ease (and we started to realize you were going to be a strong willed child!) I still remember the first time you said “I love you”, and I watch the video of it sometimes and smile!

By 18 months you were hiking short hikes with me and climbing out of your crib with ease

Right after you turned 2, Isabelle was born. It was a big adjustment for everybody. We still have trouble sharing attention sometimes, but you are the most amazing big sister to her. I love watching you two play together and seeing how much you love each other. Also around 2, you language exploded! You went from short phases to full thoughts and sentences almost overnight! One day you were saying “Boo please!” for Blue’s Clues, and the next it was “I want to watch Trolls. Not Christmas Trolls, I want to watch regular Trolls.”

You went from short phases to full thoughts and sentences almost overnight! 

I can’t believe the amazing young lady you are turning into right before my eyes. I’m going to end here, because I am rambling and it’s getting hard to see through my tears, but I love you more than anything Katie Kay. You are so strong and powerful and I know you’re going to do great things. Never let that light inside you stop shining.

Opinion Pieces

I Have a Pity Party Twice a Month, and it’s Awesome

I LOVE being a mom.  I’m not exaggerating when I say that I literally wake up *most* days and think of how I can’t wait to spend the day with my girls.  Every day is a new adventure.  Should we go somewhere?  A hike?  The park?  The beach?  Should we paint or do an obstacle course?  The possibilities are endless.  I am so fortunate that I am able to stay home with them and enrich their lives and watch them grow.

I literally wake up *most* days and think of how I can’t wait to spend the day with my girls. 

Up bright and early with the girls

But it’s hard to raise children.  You are always “on”.  I sometimes describe it to childless people as similar to being in a service position like a waiter, but every moment of every day and never getting a break.  You are always around someone, you are asked countless questions, you need to be polite and respectful.  It can be emotionally draining some days.

It can be emotionally draining some days.

Add on top of that cleaning a hundred messes a day, cooking dinner, doing the shopping and other errands, and for me, working from home.  It can definitely be overwhelming sometimes.

I can always tell when I’m starting to feel tapped out because I just wake up in a negative mood.

I can always tell when I’m starting to feel tapped out because I just wake up in a negative mood.  My adorable alarm clock wakes up at 615, as usual, in her hippo jammies, and instead of feeling excited, I wonder WHY IT’S SO EARLY.  When I do my work I notice myself grumbling about how unfair life is for moms.  We either have to leave our kids and miss out on that time with them, stay home and give up our careers, or work from home and give up every spare moment we could be cooking/cleaning/resting to work, not to mention sometimes having to tell our kids “No, I can’t read to you right now, I’m working.” 

I know no one wants to hear me complain. 

I know some of you are rolling your eyes right now.  This is why I throw MYSELF a pity party; I know no one wants to hear me complain.  My life is pretty great.  But that doesn’t mean I don’t need a mental health day every once in a while (or in my case, a couple mental health hours, because moms don’t get days off.)

I don’t clean, I don’t meal prep, I don’t work, and I don’t exercise.

Trying to work, eat, and feed Isabelle between her naps

So, on these negative days, I power through the morning, I do my momming, and I try to remain as positive as possible.  And then when the girls nap, it’s “me” time.  I don’t clean, I don’t meal prep, I don’t work, and I don’t exercise.  Instead, I eat doughnuts and corn nuts and I have a beer (I know, gasp!) and watch a funny movie.  Sometimes I cry too, if I need to, about how hard it is to be a mom, and how unfair life can be (#firstworldproblems)…

Sometimes I cry too, if I need to.

And when the girls wake up from their naps, I feel refreshed and engaged and am grateful for the time I get to spend with them.  And the next morning when my alarm clock wakes me up at 615 shouting “UP! UP!” I smile and make my coffee and get ready for the day.

They say you can’t pour from an empty cup.  Apparently my cup needs to be refilled with doughnuts and beer from time to time.