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Daily Life

Desperately Trying to Find My Zen

Posted on December 7, 2017
SERIOUS POST ALERT: How do you find balance between remaining informed and letting current events and politics stress you out? I usually don’t post about current events, but I’m having a hard time finding balance lately, especially since the fires have started. I want to remain vigilant and stay aware of where the fires are so we can stay safe, and I also want to be in the know so I can feel for the people affected, as I believe empathy keeps us human, but I can’t spend all my time watching California burn.
           It’s taking such a toll on me. And it’s not just the fires, it’s the political climate lately too. I want to be aware of legislation that will affect our family and people we care about, and I want to know about upcoming bills to be passed so I have the opportunity to contact our legislators, but it’s hard to take on so much worry all the time. Part of me wants to bury my head in the sand. Ignorance is bliss, right? But that isn’t the answer either.
          I think this is all made worse by the fact that I have anxiety and am still sort of in the post-partum period but this week has been especially rough for me. I have unfollowed a lot of pages on facebook that were posting fear-mongering type articles (especially the parenting ones, which shall remain nameless….), and I am avoiding all news for the last hour before bed. I also work out, eat well 75% of the time, and *try* to get enough sleep, aside from baby wake ups. I am interested in tips other moms have. How do you find this balance?

 

Daily Life

Co-sleeping is just not for me

Posted on December 5, 2017
Confession time: what is something veteren moms tell you “enjoy while it lasts!” that you just don’t find yourself enjoying? For us it’s cosleeping! Every night Belles wakes around 4 to nurse so I pull her in bed with me. When she was younger (and more of a lump ?), she used to fall right back asleep and we would snuggle as she slept and I half-slept.
           But lately she starts trying to climb up my body which means knees and toes in my belly and she grabs my face and neck skin (but when did I get all this extra neck skin ?) and babbles which is adorable during the day but not at 4 am…. And then I barely sleep the rest of the night and it sucks. I know some people enjoy it, and I know she won’t be little forever and I only have a small window of time to sleep with her, but lately I have started saying ENOUGH and putting her back in her crib after she’s done eating.
         And you know what? She falls right back asleep and sleeps like a rock until Big Sister gets up and wakes her up. Yes, there is still a part of me that wonders if I’ll regret not taking this “opportunity” while I can, (#momguilt , amirite?), but isn’t everyone sleeping better the ultimate win? Belles wakes up rested, I wake up rested (and rested = more patient), and we have plenty of time for snuggles during the day. What is something people tell you to “enjoy” that you just don’t think you’ll miss later?

 

Daily Life

Potty Training Struggles

Posted on December 1, 2017
After the pants pooping, I took K downtown for some one on one time. I think potty training has been really stressing her out. We also wrote a letter to Santa ? (who of course wasn’t there but will be there almost every other day until Christmas ?.) We found a guy wearing a Santa hat working at the skating rink and I asked him if he worked for Santa while nodding YES YES YES!
          He said that he did so we gave him K’s letter which said “Dear Santa, Happy Halloween. I want presents please. Little ones. I am going to poop in the potty now. And not in my pants. Happy Halloween. Happy Halloween. Love Katie.” The original plan was to talk to Santa about using the potty but hopefully the letter will help too ?. We’re getting desperate! Then we hung out and watched the ice skaters, rode the carousel, and had her first movie theater popcorn ?!
          I was hoping to call it an early night but we missed our bus and ended up walking a mile while we waited for the next one (no sense sitting at a bus station for 30 minutes.) We ended up having a pretty good walk though and then K slept until 745 today!! It’s already starting out better than yesterday!

 

Daily Life

Sibling Love

Posted on November 29, 2017
“Please bring Isabelle presents too, Santa!” ?  Siblings can be so funny. On one hand, you sometimes see jealousy, sharing is hard, sometimes there is pinching (this is usually one sided so far ?), but then I also see K come running when a stranger bends down to say hello to Isabelle, and she puts her hand on Isabelle’s head and gives them her fiercest mean face and I have to remind her that it’s okay if people talk to Isabelle.
And then last night she asked for presents for herself (“presents, red ones” ?, because she doesn’t quite grasp yet that she can choose the contents of the present… oh to be 2 and a half…) and then she also asked Santa for presents for Isabelle, which completely melted my heart. We told her in advance that this was Isabelle’s first time meeting Santa and K was so excited to introduce her like they were old friends ?. I could not ask for more this holiday season than to experience Christmas through a child’s eyes and also watch them share the magic with each other. Also I could swear that Santa is the real thing…
Daily Life

The Essence of K

Posted on November 28, 2017

Wild hair, skeleton friend, dressed by daddy, mismatched shoes (not pictured), sneaky smile, hiding in a tree that she says smells like Christmas (which she knows from a pine scented candle we have at home.) I love this photo because it really embodies Katie. All that’s missing is a perpetually dirty face no matter how often we wipe it (seriously, this kid is a dirt magnet .)

She’s loud and funny and tenacious and her personality shows in everything she does. She is giving me hell with potty training (omg this pooping issue might kill me) and taking her places is always a crap shoot because not touching is hard! (especially places like Roger’s Gardens that have beautiful fragile items all over the place …) But this is my Katie. I can’t believe such a big personality can fit in such a tiny package 

Daily Life

Of course K likes fancy cars

Posted on November 27, 2017

“Dear Santa, I’ve been REALLY good….” Today I am thankful for the places we go as a family that are not really family places, and are still treated with kindness. K has been really into cars since the car show we attended this summer. As of late, she had started to distinguish that some cars are “fancy cars” (although she has yet to mention that perhaps Mommy’s car isn’t a fancy car, but it does have a 2000s navigation system that was probably cutting edge at the time ?.)

I have always wanted to stop at this Maserati dealership (because who wouldn’t want to check out a Maserati dealership?!) but have never really had a reason, not to mention I have no plans to make a purchase (yet ?.) Today when we passed and K shouted FANCY CARS, we stopped. The salesman asked K what color car she liked and she said red and he gave her a picture with a red Ferrari on it (which she is actually sleeping with right now.)

It was nice that he came out to greet us and treated us like regular customers even though I’m sure he knew we weren’t there to purchase. And K took a picture with almost every “fancy car” and kept saying “Turn it on! Turn it on!” It’s funny how the little things can really make a toddler’s day. Test drive next time?

Daily Life

Happy Thanksgiving!

Posted on November 23, 2017

Today I am thankful for these 2 healthy beautiful girls! I have been thinking a lot about the pregnancy I lost lately… I really thought the feelings would disappear after Isabelle was born, and the fact that they haven’t makes me feel guilty sometimes. I mean, she wouldn’t be here if I hadn’t lost the pregnancy before her.

But even though the drs couldn’t say why I lost my second pregnancy, they suspected it was a blighted ovum, and would likely not have been a viable pregnancy or if it was, the baby may not have been healthy. I say this about Isabelle and not Katie because I wasn’t as worried about something going wrong with K – it was my first pregnancy, nothing had gone wrong before, and I was so terrified about the thought of a new baby that miscarriage rarely crossed my mind. With Isabelle, it was all I could think about.

But, I digress, as the focus on this post is about the positive. I am just so grateful to have these 2 healthy and happy children. It is astounding to me that it takes so long to grow a child and the cells have to replicate so many times… HOW is it that it goes exactly as planned this many times to make this many healthy babies?! Isn’t it amazing? To create a child that walks and talks and smiles and has 2 arms and 2 legs, we really don’t marvel at it enough. There’s a reason they call it the miracle of life; it’s truly nothing short of a miracle.

Daily Life

K and the Stolen Hospital Gown

Posted on November 22, 2017

Today I am thankful for this little shopping partner, who gave me such a hard time at the dr’s today that we left with the gown. And then she insisted on wearing the gown with nothing under it for the rest of the day. So we went to Vons with her looking like an escaped mental patient and she helped me shop. Her big personality makes me want to pull my hair out sometimes, but then I look at things like this and just have to laugh.

Daily Life

Dance Class

Posted on November 19, 2017

Today I am thankful for dance class!! K is such an active toddler and we are always looking for outlets for all her busy energy. What’s nice about dance is it’s structured so she gets to move her body and also learn to follow rules at the same time (as opposed to hiking where the only rule is stay away from the edge .)

I love how patient her teacher is with her (like during the first 5 weeks when K slid around on the floor like a slug for most of the class ?) and I am also impressed with how well a toddler can follow choreography!

Of course it’s a little rough around the edges but K seems to understand the motions and is able to follow along. And I think learning the moves gives her confidence. She loves to come home and make Daddy play dance class with her (“Daddy, stand on the tape right HERE!”) and teach him the moves too ?

Daily Life

#PinterestWin or #PinterestFail ?

Posted on November 17, 2017

So far we are 0 for 2 on fall art ? projects…. The leaf rubbings a couple months ago were a fail. K had no interest at all and I ended up doing leaf rubbings by myself. So this time we tried painting leaves. I found these really cool huge leaves on one of the lawns across the street and was so excited because I thought they would be perfect to paint! (Did I mention then they sat on the counter for a week while I tried to find a good day for this amazing art project? Because they did. Okay 2 weeks ?)

“Wow leaf art?!” Success!

So I packed up all of our paint stuff and hauled it to the bluff. When I took it out with the leaves K looked super excited! “Wow leaf art?!” Success! Maybe cooking around a pile of leaves for 2 weeks was worth it! (I would have just put them elsewhere but I kept telling myself “Maybe we will do our leaf art tomorrow! Might as well leave it out right?!”…. Did I just miss my opportunity to say “leaf it out”? I meant leaf it out.) ANYWAYS. K was super excited and got her paint brush ? and promptly mixed all the colors on the plate into one color (of course), which came out as a weird pale purple somehow.

Then she turned to me and said “I’m done. Let’s go home now.” And that was that.

She painted her new color all over one single leaf, and then turned to me and said “I’m done. Let’s go home now.” And that was that. So I packed the wet paint brushes into a baggie I brought, put the plate into another baggie, wrapped the one leaf she painted (along with 2 I painted, no big deal) in foil to transport so they wouldn’t smear before we could dry them at home, packed up our blanket, put Isabelle back in the carrier, and we went home 15 minutes after we arrived. Then we got home and K proudly showed Jason her single all-colors leaf and said “I MADE ART.” Not sure if this is a#pinterestfail or #pinterestwin …