Opinion Pieces

Can We Please Talk About Decision Fatigue?

I wake up every day around 6 with my kids.  I dress them, I nurse the baby and make breakfast for my toddler, and then we pack up for the day.  I take them to the park and on walks and to places like the aquarium.  When I have downtime, I work, clean, meal prep, and do laundry.  Yesterday I even made my own baby wipes. I’m not telling you all of this to complain, I’m telling you this to set the stage that I’m not a lazy person.  (Although I do partially take my kids places because I’m lazy). But I digress…. So, if I can do all of these other things, why the hell would I rather lose an arm than clean out my junk drawer (okay, drawers…)?  I did some research, and it’s because of a little thing called decision fatigue.

When I think back, I have always been indecisive.  When I was a kid and my mom would make me a bagel, I would ask for half with cream cheese, a quarter with butter, and a quarter plain, because I just couldn’t decide which I wanted the most.  I always look at the menu at restaurants for what seems like an eternity, no matter how many times I’ve been there.  Even if it’s just McDonalds (if the McRib is not back, we all know what they have to offer.). I have even googled “what should I watch on tv” because thinking about it and deciding is just too much work after a long day.

I have even googled “what should I watch on tv” because thinking about it and deciding is just too much work after a long day.

Making decisions for me feels stressful.  Sometimes the decisions are important, so the stress is warranted.  But when I get a stomach ache cleaning my junk drawer because I can’t decide what to do with a shoelace (which shoe did it come from?), 3 batteries (how do I know if they’re good or not? And if not good, how do I dispose of them?), and a button (which shirt did this come off of?), at least now I know I can blame decision fatigue.

I could probably get rid of 50% of the stuff in my closet if I could just bring myself to go through it and decide what to do with it all.

Do I kind of sound like a hoarder?  I may have a tiny bit of hoarder tendencies too if I’m being honest, but that’s not my whole problem.  I could probably get rid of 50% of the stuff in my closet if I could just bring myself to go through it and decide what to do with it all.  What about this shirt?  Does it fit?  Will it fit someday?  Do I want it?  Can I donate it?  Okay, if I donate it, now I have to wash it.  When am I going to find time to do that on top of my regular laundry and other duties?  I should just stick it back in the closet and deal with it another time.  Do you see the problems this creates for me?  Please feel free to rub your thumb and forefinger together and make a “world’s tiniest violin” joke at my expense.

Having my life decluttered and my apartment clean makes me very happy, yet looking at my junk drawers and closet and thinking of sorting them gives me a visceral reaction and I avoid it.

I’m not saying decision fatigue is a clinical diagnosis or that I need to see a doctor for my horrible problem (although depending what kind of meds are offered, the kids have been driving me kinda crazy lately!…. Kidding! Sort of.), but it does give me a little bit of peace of mind knowing WHY I have such a hard time doing some of the things I know would improve my quality of life. 

Having my life decluttered and my apartment clean makes me very happy, yet looking at my junk drawers and closet and thinking of sorting them gives me a visceral reaction and I avoid it.  I was honestly starting to think I had depression (thank you Dr. Google!).

Yesterday I cleaned out the kitchen cupboards and it was easy for me.  Do you know why?  I told myself it was because I love cooking and having the kitchen organized was more important to me than other rooms.  But I was lying to myself.  It was because everything I looked at had 3 options:  Is it expired?  Is it expired yet still usable? (I don’t care that my chicken bouillon expired a month ago to be honest. Okay, maybe it expired at the end of May.). Is it not expired and can be put back on the shelf?  That’s it. This was so easy for me because there was almost no decision to be made.  And now about 50% of my kitchen cupboards, as well as the fridge and freezer, are clean and organized and every time I pass the kitchen, I take a peek in them and feel good about myself.

I hate throwing away things that someone else could use.

If you are thinking to yourself, I am like this but so is everyone else, I have found out that NO, not everyone is!  Both my boyfriend and my dad can sort through a junk drawer in minutes and probably throw out 90% of what was in there.  Because either “we don’t need it” or “we probably don’t need it but can buy another one if we do.”  But here’s my argument against that: I hate wasting!  I hate throwing away things that someone else could use so if I have something I don’t need, maybe someone else DOES need it, and now I have more decisions to make about what to do next with it.  And that’s hard for me.

Charcuterie plate

 

Before I had heard of decision fatigue, I already noticed things I have started to do in my life that make it so much easier for me and I didn’t realize what they all had in common.  I LOVE lists, for one.  I sometimes look at what we got from the grocery store and make lists of dinner options for us to choose from each night (and usually I’ll have Jason choose).  Or I’ll do charcuterie because then I can have some of everything.  I also plan out outfits for the girls the night before (but not mine because who cares what I wear).  I’ve even heard Obama used to plan out his shirts and ties for a week!  (No, I didn’t fact check this and I don’t know if it’s actually true so I’ll just roll with it #fakenews).  But what do these things have in common?!  Less decision making!  I am starting to find out what works in SOME areas of my life but not all.

Now that my kitchen cupboards are sorted and I know how good it feels, I need to do more. 

So here’s what I’m asking of you, friends.  Now that my kitchen cupboards are sorted and I know how good it feels, I need to do more.  Our apartment is not that big to have all the crap we do but I will need some help sorting.  Jason and I decided on Monday we will each coffee up (Yay Starbucks!) and get to work on at minimum the kitchen and bathroom and really really hoping to get to the closet too.  I would love to hear advice from other people who suffer from decision fatigue on how you force yourself to sort through things without getting too burned out and stay organized once you are done.  Thanks in advance!

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